Can You Guard Your Heart?

Recently, I asked how one becomes a different person and answered that one becomes different by acting differently, as opposed to wishing to be different. Of course, people tend to assume one would only act differently if one wished to do so. But that is not necessarily true. People sometimes act in ways that will lead them to become someone that they do NOT want to become. A person who overindulges in alcoholic beverages often does not want to become an alcoholic. But such repeated overindulgence leads there no matter what he desires.

Another instance of behavior leading a person to becoming different apart from his desire to change is child-rearing. Parents have goals for their children’s character and require various behaviors of them in the hope that it will bring about that change. This often starts long before the child has any idea that adulthood lies in his future or that he is developing into a character that will be partly determined in the present.

Notice that the parents are in a similar position to their child’s future character as the heavy drinker is to a future alcoholic. The fact that they desire their child to grow up to become a certain kind of adult does not mean that he will do so. While their actions in shepherding a child don’t absolutely guarantee the outcome, they still have to take action to make such an outcome probable. Hoping the child will “turn out well” while leaving him to his own devices will not end well (apart from some significant intervention from elsewhere), no matter their wishes.

From these two instance we can form a conclusion that I think will be helpful. A man who realizes he is in a cycle of overindulging in alcoholic beverages needs to adopt the attitude toward himself that is analogous to a parent who is concerned for his young child. In a sense, he needs to realize that he has two roles. On the one hand, there are things he likes to do that will have bad outcomes—in this case excessive drinking. On the other hand, he wants a good outcome in the future.

Proverbs encourages this kind of thinking about ourselves as possessing this dual role.

• “Let not steadfast love and faithfulness forsake you; bind them around your neck; write them on the tablet of your heart” (Proverbs 3:3 ESV).
• “Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life” (Proverbs 4:23 ESV).

Christians often think of the heart as the all-determining factor in a person’s will: One cannot decide what one’s heart wants because the heart determines what one decides. But the Bible does not always speak this way. Like a parent has influence over a child so you have influence over your heart. You can direct it as well as be led by it.