1. Think of all the people you want to behave better. Think of all the people you know who you want to be better husbands or fathers or wives or mothers or employees or students or managers of their time or money or emotions. You want them to be better Christians who show greater wisdom and more consistent character. Ones who empower themselves and are trustworthy to all those around them rather than people who sabotage themselves and are unreliable. People who honor God in their conduct rather than shame Him.
2. Then think about how self-defeating it is to try to get people to improve. This should be easy if you think about what happens when anyone tries to get you to improve your behavior in any significant way. Even a pastor, parent, or teacher finds it difficult to help people change their behavior in the case of someone who is their responsibility. People tend to get defensive and resentful rather than receiving help in a constructive way.
3. Then think of the relative value of praying to God to change people for the better.
4. Then remember how God wants us to be serious and sincere about what we pray for. He doesn’t only hear our words but watches our actions. Indeed, actions are often received by God as prayers (i.e. Psalm 28:2; 63:4).
5. At some point you may realize that the best prayer for others to behave better would include behaving better yourself, not primarily to be a good example (a possible good thing but also a possible trap–Matthew 6:1-4) but to testify to God, who cannot be deceived, what kind of character you value. After all, if you aren’t displaying the character you say you want in others, how much do you really value such character?
Thus, from a theological point of view, you need to be the transformation you want to see in the world. That may not be all you should do, but you should never do anything less.