Spider-Man & Proverbs: Uncle Ben as Solomon Begging His Son to Pursue Wisdom

I’m so old, that I still think of Tobey Maguire as the “real” Spider-Man. Whether you share that flaw or not, this scene is a perfect thematic introduction to Proverbs and what Solomon is trying to say to his son:

If you know how the story goes, you know that Peter Parker does eventually listen to his uncle, but it takes an irreversible tragedy to unstop his ears. And it is difficult to judge Parker’s foolishness too severely. It is typical for a son to want to believe that his entry into adulthood is so unique that no older man can have insight into it based on his past experiences. Parker has an additional excuse to think that Uncle Ben doesn’t know what he’s going through.

Also, for the majority of his past life, Peter has been a child and Uncle Ben a giant–a kind of superhero–in his life. Now, Peter is not only the superhero, but Uncle Ben is an increasingly decrepit old man. This would be like a euphoric drug to a teenage boy. So he finds it painfully backwards to voluntarily submit to this man as a source of wisdom, no matter how much he loves him.

But all young men are in a transitional stage. They are on the cusp of adulthood. Proverbs is especially aimed at them, though everyone can and should profit from the book.

Children start off in life as virtual slaves. As Paul wrote: “I mean that the heir, as long as he is a child, is no different from a slave, though he is the owner of everything, but he is under guardians and managers until the date set by his father” (Galatians 4:1-2; ESV). A child is a slave because others give him orders. If a child’s parents hire a tutor to teach him, that tutor will be a mere employee of the parents. He won’t be a member of the family. But the child will be required to submit to his authority. The child is, while he is being taught, required to heed a mere hired hand.

As a child outgrows the “slavery” of childhood, another change is supposed to occur. As a boy becomes a man, his judgement is supposed to improve. According to Paul, Christ gave pastors and other gifts to the Church:

….until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ, so that we may no longer be children, tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes (Ephesians 4:13-14).

We learn from this that children are not only like slaves in how they are treated in the family social hierarchy, but they lack discernment. They are vulnerable to those who would exploit them by deceit. Their emotions and desires can be used to manipulate them. They are easily enslaved. A mature adult should not be so vulnerable.

So, a child is a slave and there’s nothing wrong with that. He has been given parents to protect him and allow him to grow up to become a mature adult who has discernment.

But what can go wrong?

A young child often sees adults as possessing an amazing amount of freedom. They get to go to bed when they want. They drink alcoholic beverages. They decide when to eat ice cream and how much. They determine their own limits in watching video entertainment. No one tells them (a child thinks) what to do.

Thus, a child’s impression of adult freedom is something like being a child without parental supervision. Freedom is seen as getting to play whenever one wants.

As a child grows up, he should understand that this is not a proper conception of adulthood, but sinful human beings are prone to wishful thinking even when they are smart enough to know better. They resist the Apostle Paul’s wisdom: “When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways” (1 Corinthians 13:11). When you refuse to give up childish ways, you don’t thereby really remain a child. A young man has more intelligence, knowledge, and strength than he did as a child. Sexual development is also a new element in his life. Yet, if he doesn’t embrace wisdom, he will be prone to treat these new interests and abilities as if they were new toys, rather than as adult gifts and adult responsibilities. And if this continues, he will be ruled by these out-of-control desires and destructive habits. He will act like a slave rather than a king.

Proverbs warns that he will truly become a slave if he refuses to depart from such foolishness.